We are thrilled you have invited yourself to stay the night all day tomorrow too
I am far too sober for your dramatic bullshit.
Fuck your fucking Bollinger I am sinking Lidl champange and devouring two..
I'm certain that the party is not the mood to hear David Gray's 'Babylon', sorry
David Byrne singing This Must Be The Place (Naive Melody).
Please do not text your dealer. This was meant to be a simple drinks do.
Bra-fucking-vo on successfully testing my patience to its limit.
I must confess I hearted the video you sent without actually watching it.
Sorry those napkins are for a different calibre of guest. We have kitchen roll..
I'll bring a fucking book with me next time rather than hear your same sodding..
Fuck your fucking smoothies I am drinking palomas and having fun.
The more I see you the more I realise I like you less than the previous time.
Sorry but please do not expect me to commit to any Sunday plans.
Sometimes you just have to stick on some Taylor, have a big cry and pour..
Don't you dare interrupt me when I am drinking a nice crisp white and swaying..
Sorry but I need to wait at least 4 hours to reply to make it appear I am..
Please note that when you put your wine in our fridge, it is now our wine.
I am sorry I cannot come as I am eagerly awaiting the arrival of a promising..
Sorry I am not coming I am staying home to listen to some Sufjan and have a..
Sorry I can't come for I have realised I can get out of plans by simply saying..
